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Monday, June 15, 2009I seriously need to let everything inside of me outoften i wonder,why is it i worked so hard for?One example,basketball,i put in so much effort till my body isn't able to keep up with daily routines or aching back /leg here and there.But where am i now?i am no national player,no adidas player. is this life's cruel sick joke of telling me that ,everything i do seems to go down the drain? I do the extreme, i wear weights to school daily,i read basketball book daily,always watch matches,wake up at 5.30am ,head to school by 6.20am,before school starts just to practice my shots,carry a ball with me when i goto school and make sure i dribble on my way to school, most of the time i dribble in school too,watch videos again and again,take down notes,sleep with my basketball,and before i goto bed i make sure i memorise everything about shooting.I took up any sports possible that could help me in basketball whether its footwork,physical or mentally. I've sacrifised so much..just to find out i am still nothing?Its really unfair.. this has always been in my mind for 3years.well to make things worst i started basketball late,went to a screwed up secondary school (geylang methodist secondary school)which close down ccas just to build their new school. Just like basketball..all i've ever asked for was..just a shot in life.just one chance. And great, my body is too sickly and damaged to do anything.I have to go for physio for one and half years for both back and knees.My knee caps are out of place,It has squeeky sound, i wake up everyday with aching backs,feeling really lethargic,sometimes i limp or feel really sharp pain here and there,and all for the cost of what?Basketball..Do i honestly deserve such fate?I trained my butts off,I did frog jump,everyday,did fireman lifts everyday,till several jumping drills,that's why my leg became like this,I dribble my basketball during my recess time,train when i have free period,read books when i am absolutely doing nothing.I am not discriminating anyone but..there are gangsters who barely worked hard,infact they don't.tatoos all over,and stuff,but they get a chance to play don't they,they receive acknowledgements?I haven't once,received any.So what if i am the fastest guy on the court at most times,or gives hard defense.I am just a guy who stands 166cm tall,whose on the verge of being a handicap and still no where in life. Its sad to say..so many people..have no idea how blessed they are,to be in a basketball school since young,get to wear jersey in which they dont even give a damn about. Well this is just basketball itself,theres are a few more but maybe this takes of 1/8 of the burden in my mind..I swear man i feel so childish ranting about this in my blog.makes me feel like i am a 2year old.
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